Through the eyes of Claire…

Today marks two years since our son Connor was promoted to heaven.  Along with grief, loss brings about growth and choices.  The following has been written by our daughter Claire as her college entrance essay.  By God’s grace, wherever she chooses to serve in life, there will be benevolence flowing through her.  All of our children have a story and possibly someday the others will write theirs.  Today, with Claire’s blessing, I share hers…MamaC

There have been two life ­changing events that brought significant growth in my 18 years. An opportunity for character development and integrity arose in August of 2010. The first week of my sixth grade year, our family adopted two children from foster care. It was challenging adding two new people into our close knit family of five. As the second oldest of five children, and oldest daughter, there were always young eyes looking to me for guidance. This opportunity has taught me things I would not otherwise have known. Seeing the effects of neglect, abuse and subsequent post-traumatic stress, caused by their past, has changed my view of life. It also brought realization of how blessed my life has been. To witness their constant struggles with unseen, internal injuries is heartbreaking. My family was growing stronger when tragedy struck that would bring opportunity for growth through loss.

October 18, 2014 is a day I will never forget. It was a day just like any other; at least I thought it was. That evening I attended a trivia night that was going to support the mission team I was serving with in Honduras. After trivia was over, I attended a bonfire with my friends. Suddenly, my volleyball coach arrived and informed me that my older brother had been in a car accident away at college. The first thing that popped into my head was that he was in a car with one of his friends and they were in a fender bender. When I look back on the situation, I believe I was in denial. I did not want to imagine anything tragic happening to someone I love. He took me home where we joined my younger siblings, Uncle, Cousin, a Pastor and my former Principal. My parents were on the four hour journey to the hospital with my Aunt and our Pastor when they received the news.

At 11 p.m., my best friend and older brother passed away. He was walking across the street and was struck by a car. We were informed that after he was hit, he got up and said he was fine. His friend that was with him looked to make sure the driver was unharmed and when he turned around my brother was not there. Adrenaline had enabled him to run several blocks before he collapsed in the street. He was taken to the nearest hospital with severe internal injuries, including a collapsed lung. The hospital could not provide him with the attention he needed. They were airlifting him to the nearest trauma center; however, they only made it a short way before he was gone. He was 19 years old and a freshman at Truman State University. He was an honor student, member of Pi Kappa Phi fraternity and the ROTC Army program. He was the most inspirational person I have ever known. I turned to God in prayer quickly after the accident. I thanked Him for all the amazing memories I had with my brother. He had touched so many lives, especially mine.

I grew as a person through both the blessing of adoption and a tragic loss. I have learned that God will never give us a burden to hold, without giving us the strength to carry it. My faith and strength has become my own through adversity. These opportunities of strength have enabled me to become a disciplined leader, not only for my family, but for school and other activities. These leadership roles have equipped me for life outside my comfort zone and encouraged me to expand my horizons. I believe that my journey so far has been a platform of learning that will propel me to serve others during college and beyond.

Claire Cunningham – Belmont University Class of 2021

Photo:  Jill Heupel Photography October 2016  http://www.jillheupel.com