Dear Mama…
Your strength, beauty and grace shines. Your unimaginable loss is never forgotten. You are understood, loved and never alone .
Beautifully written by Kelli Clodfelter.
“October 1, 2014… life was “normal”. I had no idea our world was about to take a dive into a journey no parent should ever understand. I had no clue there would only be 6 more days we would be whole. Today I reflect on what most of us miss when life is just typical. When my biggest obstacles involved working, running a household and still getting up several times of the night to feed a beautiful baby. Worrying if my boys were making good decisions in life and if they knew how very much I loved them all when it seemed to be I was always lecturing them because I was scared of the path they were walking. But soon very soon I would come to understand what it was like being up all night crying with empty arms, not being able to call my son and realizing everything I thought I understood about myself and our future was no longer an option. Trying to cope with things that use to come easy to me no longer being easy. Brushing my teeth, sleeping, showering, work, my passion for so many things was now the hardest tasks I faced every single day. Yes l, what I would do to get back October 1, 2014. I am working hard to stay focused and remember how far myself and my family have come over 6 years, but I will not lie this time of the year as the cool air blows, the leaves fall and holidays approach I feel the void even stronger. My mind wonders of what life was suppose to look like. I question once again why us? I hurt at a level I do not expect anyone to relate to unless they too understand. I remind myself I am grateful for every single person who does not relate, I hope I have and continue to make a difference in honor of our son and daughter. And I begin to debate how to spend two of the worst days of my life anniversaries…..”
May the peace of God which surpasses all understanding, keep our hearts and minds in Christ Jesus our Lord. Amen
Peace & Blessings,
MamaC
