False positive…

A false positive is a test result that is incorrect because the test indicated a condition finding that does not exist. As we were expecting our second child, I was told she would have down-syndrome. We were given choices to consider for controlling this outcome. She was born a healthy, beautiful, determined, sweet baby girl. We would have loved her with or without an extra chromosome.

As working parents, outside the home and raising our family, we felt compelled to keep complete control over all that was going on. It was exhausting and also a false sense of power. Raising inquisitive, adventurous, full throttle kids can be as rewarding as it is challenging. Loving and giving them grace is also a feat in itself. When you lose a child, you realize that “power” you felt was truly a false-postive. Today, I see fear all around in this free country we live in. For me, having true peace is found in only one place. If our son had not been promoted to heaven so early in life, I would not have understood this. I pray you will turn that evil (false control) around to live each day fully and allow your children the same.

Profound change creates strength where worry once lived. Worry for another, where control is only imagined. Waking up, realizing loss, is surreal. There is no way to stop it, protect it or wish it back. Helpless waves of guilt and humility as a protector, become clearly evident there is only one…singular. It is not me nor you. Change by choice? Not! Desperation likely…lesson learned, growth spurt.

New eyes, new heart, new breath with respect for sacrifice. A turning point, on bent knee, eyes upward, pleading for mercy. He loves far greater than expected. He breathes life into souls destined for self reliance. His love is miraculous, patient, kind and forever. No waiting, He paid, it’s free to believe. The book of answers has been here all along, on a shelf, collecting dust. Walking by faith not fear. Define hurt:  we’ve lost a child. Yet, how do you smile? We have been smothered with grace and mercy by our Father in Heaven. Your Father, IF you trust and pray, will catch you WHEN you fall with broken wings formed by pride. Fear can drive your life. Get busy living with Him or get busy dying…THIS is your control, your choice, today.

Forever grateful for CHRISTmas,
MamaC

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. John 10:10

Photo:  Christmas 2003