Brother from another Mother…

God gives us what we need at the proper time. My sister and her husband have been together forever. At least that’s what they say. 🙂 Twenty seven years to be exact.  Uncle T has always been the light hearted, funny guy in the family. When tragedy struck 18 months ago, with the loss of our son, his nephew, I saw a side of him I had never experienced. He stepped up, took charge and led us through, as we felt our world crumbling around us. I do believe I may have even used the word “pushy” at one point, but only in love.

Last weekend, he unexpectedly lost Billy, his best friend, in all things fun from little boys, until this year.  To lose two important people in your “family” so close together, one could drown in grief.  As I stood back understanding, yet feeling helpless, I watched in amazement. Billy had just proposed to Tommy’s cousin Gretchen, this past Christmas. Instead of the expected wedding, Tommy stepped up to run his funeral. I’m sure he would have loved to have a pastor there but the family had asked him.  In Tommy’s words to me, “he had just been on a mission trip to Honduras and had an hour of evangelism training and a week in the mission field, so there was that…”

As the funeral began, he spoke lovingly with entertaining stories about who Billy was and how he lived his life. He spoke of the big heart he had and shared with others in his physical therapy practice. Several others got up and spoke of their love for Billy. Tommy directed the service from beginning to the end of an hour. I know how much he was hurting. He smiled and spoke without hesitation. He stood by Billy’s father’s side as he chose to speak a few words. In my heart, as I looked up in that room, all I could see was Billy and Connor standing with Jesus.  It was obvious to me they were shining down on Tommy as he spoke.  The funeral home room seemed outstandingly bright, even as sobbing was evident.  Tears rolled down my face for the loss of Billy and those that mourned him.  I couldn’t help but be in awe, as I saw how God gave Tommy strength.

Uncle T calls me to meet for coffee every so often.  He meets only to check on how I am doing.  He asks for nothing.  He volunteered to be the Vice President of our non-profit Chosen to Shine that began just over a year ago. He gently, yet often, reminds me that most don’t go at the “speed of Lauri.”  As water poured into our basement only hours after his birthday celebration, he saved Connor’s room with a window well sump pump.  He watches our kids, dogs and in every way supports our family when needed.  All this accomplished on top of his career as safety director at Wegman Electric.  My funny light hearted brother in law, Godparent to our children, husband to my sister, father to my niece, is what you can only imagine. My heart is grateful and humbled by this man I only thought…I knew before. Tommy, you shine for many everyday. We love you.  MamaC

The Lord upholds all who fall and lifts up all who are bowed down. The eyes of all look to you, and you give them their food at the proper time. You open your hand and satisfy the desires of every living thing. Psalm 145:14-16

Photo:  Tommy & Melia serving with World Gospel Outreach in Honduras, January 2016.