SHINE ON!
I love to laugh and be around people that are learning to SHINE! When you walk in darkness, it’s then, that you have the most opportunity to shine. Only in the dark can you see the light. I know this too well…
Each week is a new experience in this “new” life we are leading without Connor. I would think that time would help. It just reminds me of how long it has been since I’ve seen his beautiful smile, heard his voice or opinion which he gave as freely as he did hugs. I find myself going down a dark path of what if’s. I wonder each day if he even realized how hurt he was without showing a scratch on the outside. I wonder why his new “friends” didn’t go to the hospital to see if he was okay or if they could help. Some days are just harder than others…
In those same thoughts, I quickly bounce back to my “new” reality. The new eyes that I see with each day. What keeps going through my mind, is that Connor would not want me to be unhappy. He didn’t want me unhappy when he was standing right in front of me. 😀 He loved it when everything was good. I know that he is skating down streets paved of gold to music we can only imagine. While we are here, thinking of how to show thankfulness, for the days and years we spent together.
It seems that no matter how sad some days can be now, God always sends Angels to lift us up. I cannot tell you how many days I am thinking are dark. Those waves of grief always hitting us an the most unexpected times. At our darkest moments, I believe God sends us exactly what we need to lift us up. The kind words written to me in emails, personal messages, texts and even old fashioned letters are always gratefully received and ALWAYS at the time I need them the most! I have seen more kindness in these past 8 months than I have ever experienced in my life, and that is quite a few years…You never know when a kind word given will change someone’s life. Always give them freely. If you are thinking someone needs a smile, give it to them. They may not smile back, but they receive it and I’d bet they remember it.
Our new non-profit for high school teens and college age students is called “Chosen to Shine.” We work hard to find ways to SHINE in this dark world. Connor loved to Shine and he did daily. I cannot think of one day where there was an opportunity to Shine and he did not run with it. By Shine, I mean truly seeing the good in others, helping others smile, loving the life and person God made you. (He does not make mistakes.) Connor could do that for others, even when they did not know that they were Chosen to Shine. He had a way of bringing that shine out of others, ever since I knew him. He knew that God’s glory is shining…when we are connected to Him, we Shine! I, in no way, mean that he was not a sinner, as we all are, he was. He just knew how to Shine and how to apologize when he didn’t.
I miss him every second of every day. I want to surround myself and others with people that want to SHINE. Seeing the bigger picture in life is easy when you are serving others. There is great joy in it. You don’t need to look for something to do, it’s right in front of you. Good choices, make you happy. I never heard anyone say they wish they could redo a good choice. The truth is easy. Even if the outcome is hard, it’s always the best way to go. Thank you to all the Angels that are sent my way each day and lift me up! Everyone knows that Angels shine!
Let the light of His presence Shine on your pursuit, so that you can see it from His perspective. Seek God first in all you do – then His light will SHINE on the road you should take. Peace & Blessings! MamaC
The Lord Bless you and keep you; the Lord make His face shine on you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn His face toward you and give you peace. Numbers 6:24-26.
