Happy Message…
http:/https://youtu.be/Peu5iUmSNs0
Connor’s message is one of happiness and love that he shared with me always. Today marks 30 weeks and 210 days without my kindred spirits call. I share this with you and hope that he brings a smile to you, as he does to me, each and everyday.
John had joined me on a work trip to Las Vegas the week before Connor left us. Like many families with several children, we don’t normally get away by ourselves. Now matter where I was, I spoke with Connor everyday. When he left for school it was one of the hardest times for me, as it is for many parents. The oldest child leaving home, for a new adventure in college, is challenging on the heart. I tried hard not to bother him, even as I worried. He faithfully called or texted me, to let me know he was good. Rarely did he call distressed. He was happy and enjoying himself. Change and the first semester away for many young adults, can bring them home quickly. If Connor was homesick, he surely did not show it. When he was struggling with 17 hours, ROTC and pledging a fraternity, he called and asked for ideas on how to manage it all. He knew with five kids and working parents we could help in time management. He was turning the tides and things were beginning to flow for him, as we spoke about this only hours before he left us.
I realize I’m a bit unusual…the word proud always makes me cringe. I felt Connor was a huge blessing and gift to us. Anytime someone would lovingly say, “you must be so proud,” I immediately felt uncomfortable. I have found that the moment you think all is grand, you will get a reminder of who is really in charge and how sinful we all are. Life here on earth may be short, you never know from day to day what lies ahead. Be kind, love deeply, forgive always, look up and be happy. MamaC
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 1 Corinthians 13:4
Thank God for videos, pictures, audio recordings, & social media. While all of these can be negative when used with the wrong intentions or misguided intentions, what a blessing for those who have to say goodbye too soon. Thank you for sharing your treasures & your wisdom born of suffering & pain. Things you share make me pause, reflect, & give thanks. Love you so much.
Ok, I’m providing too much information in my reply, a bit embarrassed to even share, but this is a text message I received just yesterday morning
“Do you ever wake up and think “Damn it’s a good day” and just thank god for your life and the lives of your children? If you always look for what you don’t have or don’t get then you never get to appreciate what you already have!”
That message hit me like a good punch in the stomach, it came from someone I care deeply for and was in fact tinged with truth under the circumstances surrounding the conversation. I promptly logged onto your blog, I routinely gain perspective from it, although I always follow up my read with the thought of wishing your family to have never had to go through such tragedy and continued pain. As I have told you in other posts, your strength and perspective are inspirational, more than you can ever ever know…even in times of the smallest un-thought of ways. Your last sentence of this post says it all! Wishing you peace my friend!
Thank you for sharing this message with me! Many days, it is most difficult for me to wake up and think it’s a good day without my oldest son. However, finding the good in what you have is of the utmost importance to me everyday. I used to take things for granted to much, as many do. Now, when I hear people complaining about circumstances, especially with challenging kids, I cringe. If today were the last day of your life, would you be happy with how you spent it? Peace & Blessings to you too! MamaC
Oh man. That was something. really awesome treasure you have there.