Roots grow wings #firstborn #toofast

One year ago today, Connor brought home his graduation attire.  I posted this photo of his cap and gown with the title above.  I couldn’t believe he was already finishing high school.  Little did I know then, what I know now and how truly fast life can fly.

I have forever felt, that all people, are a gift from God.  He giveth and he taketh.  Be thankful each and everyday for your gifts.  Enjoy them fully.  Do not spend moments of your life speaking ill will or negatively towards others.  “He gave you life, don’t waste it”…is excellent advice from our son’s words and permanent post it, tattooed on his right side.

For those of you in my age category, my kids taught me…Time hop is an app “memory”.  It shows what you have posted on social media on that same day, last year and previous years.  I appreciate this simple reminder of what I was doing only a year ago or more, as my memory has faded with this adventure known as grief.  

The day Connor left us, he told me that he had written an essay for school.  It was found on the printer in his dorm and was handed to me, upon my arrival to retrieve his things.  I love what he wrote, it was him and it was truth.  

“The Life and Times of Connor J. Cunningham”

Truman State University

Fall 2014

The life of a boy from southern Illinois could surely hold some interesting stories. I would hope so, as those stories and experiences have helped shape who I am today. Though one may not expect a simple Illinoisan to be exciting, every story is unique; and I would like to share mine.

I was born in August, 1995, in Texas, but I would hardly consider myself a Texan. We moved from there just six short weeks after I was born to a town called Edwardsville, Illinois. It became my home for my entire pre-college career. I began going to a parochial school called Trinity Lutheran when I was three. I switched to another parochial school, Trinity St. Paul, after second grade, for two years.  I moved to public school for fifth through seventh grades. I graduated eighth grade from Trinity St. Paul. Edwardsville High School is where I attended and graduated in the class of 2014. I played on the tennis team, played violin in the orchestra, and was a member of National Honors Society. As the oldest of my siblings, I was the first to graduate from high school, and my family supported me all the way.

My family is not a typical family. There are my mother and father, myself, and my four younger siblings: Claire, Calvin, Callie, and Carter. We have one dog, five fish, and a turtle. My mother is extremely supportive and loving; she will always remain my listed emergency contact. My father is just as supportive and loving as she is. My siblings and I all get along most of the time, but with five kids there is bound to be some amusing sibling rivalry. The most interesting fact about my family is that my youngest two siblings, Callie and Carter, are both adopted.

Callie and Carter’s adoption was just as life changing for me as it was for them. It called for a lot of integrity and played a huge role in my character development. They were adopted into our family the first week of my freshman year from the foster care system. It was challenging adding two new people into our tightly knit family. As the oldest of five, there are always young eyes looking to me for guidance. This opportunity taught me things I would not otherwise have known. Seeing the effects of neglect and the subsequent post-traumatic stress caused by their past has changed my life. The trauma they underwent caused regression, trust issues, and health issues. They brought me to a realization of how blessed my life has been. They have come far in the past four years and I hope to be a positive role model, not only for them, but also for future generations.

I want to make a difference in peoples’ lives after my college years. My plan is to contract with ROTC, graduate from Truman State University and get my degree in the field of exercise science, then serve my country. After the army, I aspire to use my degree to open my own gym and offer classes like dance and gymnastics to children with internal disabilities. Whenever my adopted siblings are having a bad day, they can always fix it by dancing. I want to help as many as I can to fix their bad days.

I like to think that I have seen a lot of things, but I know that in comparison to the future I am only just beginning to open my eyes. I cannot fathom what is in store. That is the story of this boy from southern Illinois.

Funny that he used the word fathom…

He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.  I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live.  Ecclesiastes 3:11-12

As we are gifted a new week, please move forward with a full heart,  looking to do good for others and be happy as your story unfolds!

Peace & Blessings!  MamaC